Send Lawyers, Guns and Money
A few days ago I realized that I have been living in the District for about a year now. At this point, I think I am qualified to make some statements about the city that I call home, Washington, DC. So, sit back, relax and enjoy some random observations about our nations capitol.
Lawyers-They are everywhere. I do believe that 90% of the people in DC are attorneys. Everywhere I go, everyone I meet seems to practice law of some sort. If you spit in this town, it is more than likely that you will hit a lawyer-which I guess is a good thing seeing as there is so much...
Crime-DC is GHETTO. No if's and's or but's. Last night, on my way home from Union Station I saw a prostitute being arrested a block from my apartment. She was nasty, wearing just a bra and panties. I feel I am constantly seeing people get arrested for pretty major things. Every morning when I walk to work I smell pot being smoked in the park. More than one person has tried to sell me crack. And, come on, the town in full of politicians and lawyers-enough said.
Homelessness-The ten percent of DC that isn't working in some sort of legal career is homeless. When I first got to this town, I genuinely felt bad for all of these folks sans homes. I would buy them food, give them money, etc. Now, I have come to loathe them. I work 8 hours a day, five days a week-why can't they? A huge chunk of the homeless population in DC is incredibly rude taboot. I remember one guy coming up to me while I was eating a lunch that consisted of hot dogs and a soda...
Bum: Give me some money.
Rook: I don't have any money. Do you want some lunch?
Bum: What do you got?
Rook: A hot dog.
Bum: Give me some money.
Seriously folks, I can't make this kind of stuff up...
Alcoholics-In this respect, I have never felt more at home. The people in this city-lawyers, criminals and the homeless alike all have one thing in common-they share a major love of alcohol. I think that the majority of the people that inhabit this city hate their lives so much, that the only thing to do to numb the pain is consume enormous amounts of booze. Believe me, I am not complaining...
Hatred towards Northern Virginia and Maryland-We really don't like our suburbs. For me, it is more of a convenience issue than anything else. I once ended a relationship because the guy lived in Bethesda, under the pretense of not doing long distance relationships. It takes a lot to get me out of this city, and I think that most would agree.
DC---there ain't no place like home, MUTHA FUCKA!
Lawyers-They are everywhere. I do believe that 90% of the people in DC are attorneys. Everywhere I go, everyone I meet seems to practice law of some sort. If you spit in this town, it is more than likely that you will hit a lawyer-which I guess is a good thing seeing as there is so much...
Crime-DC is GHETTO. No if's and's or but's. Last night, on my way home from Union Station I saw a prostitute being arrested a block from my apartment. She was nasty, wearing just a bra and panties. I feel I am constantly seeing people get arrested for pretty major things. Every morning when I walk to work I smell pot being smoked in the park. More than one person has tried to sell me crack. And, come on, the town in full of politicians and lawyers-enough said.
Homelessness-The ten percent of DC that isn't working in some sort of legal career is homeless. When I first got to this town, I genuinely felt bad for all of these folks sans homes. I would buy them food, give them money, etc. Now, I have come to loathe them. I work 8 hours a day, five days a week-why can't they? A huge chunk of the homeless population in DC is incredibly rude taboot. I remember one guy coming up to me while I was eating a lunch that consisted of hot dogs and a soda...
Bum: Give me some money.
Rook: I don't have any money. Do you want some lunch?
Bum: What do you got?
Rook: A hot dog.
Bum: Give me some money.
Seriously folks, I can't make this kind of stuff up...
Alcoholics-In this respect, I have never felt more at home. The people in this city-lawyers, criminals and the homeless alike all have one thing in common-they share a major love of alcohol. I think that the majority of the people that inhabit this city hate their lives so much, that the only thing to do to numb the pain is consume enormous amounts of booze. Believe me, I am not complaining...
Hatred towards Northern Virginia and Maryland-We really don't like our suburbs. For me, it is more of a convenience issue than anything else. I once ended a relationship because the guy lived in Bethesda, under the pretense of not doing long distance relationships. It takes a lot to get me out of this city, and I think that most would agree.
DC---there ain't no place like home, MUTHA FUCKA!
posted by Rook @ 10:00 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home